The offical parenting thread (rant / tell stories/post pics)

[code]

Alright, rather then bastardizing the TAT thread any further than we already have, I figured I'd start up another thread. Ken intrigued me with his start to a story and lack of the finish.

So let the fun begin..

[Laoch]

I'll hold my tongue, err... fingers for now.

Suffice to say that besides TJ, whom a lot of you have met, I have an 18 yo daughter

[Rut Row]

Where to start...

the first time I brought a date home to meet the girls?

the time when I mended the holes in the knees of the girls prized jeans?

the time I let the middle girl sit in jail all night when she ran away?

the oldest's first date when all 3 of my 6'4"+ brothers were at the house and her date may have been 5'4" with lifts? (let the record show he brought her home 30 minutes early)

but I think I'll start with the time when the middle girl swore that all the kids wore mismatched socks and was making my life unbearable because I wouldn't let her. What she forgot was the school principle was one of my old teachers so I called him and asked if I could verify her claims. We got there early before the buses unloaded - there we were, Mr Chivone (the principle), me and Wendy standing in the hallway as the kids unloaded and came into school. She was getting weird looks from her classmates, I'm eying perfectly matching socks and Mr Chivone was telling stories about how the Kyler Brothers were the terror of the township (all totally untrue I might add). Needless to say, Wendy never again asked to wear unmatched socks, or for that fact anything that came even marginally outside the norm for fear of a repeat verification.

She's now 38 and still tells of how I ruined her life

[401dan]

how about getting plastered on your 18th b day sunday going to school with your budy MARK after throwing up on his moms antique rug oops $300.00 to get it cleaned and going to shcool with long island ice tea in a qt bottle and passing that in math class 8:05 am at the pencil sharpener and while attempting to put the allmost empty jar in the desk clank clank when miss LEIDLICK said bring that here dan crap and i took it to her only a few drops left but boy you could tell it was booze. did i forget to mention my mom worked with the principals wife DAMN.busted. office visit was cool principal said he would take it frome here but that -itch wouldnt let it go and told him it was liquer he tried to let it go i got 26 days suspension but he did get me back in school with a word to the board came so close to being expelled he was very cool for a principal. teacher well a -itch of coarse no picnic from parrents either .the guys tried to tell me to run out and throw the jar on the roof but i was still toasted from the night before. true story.

[code]

Am sure that Cam will say we ruined his life at some point. Hopefully not when he's 38. I've actually come to appreciate what my parents did for us growing up. 3 boys and I only have 1! I can't imagine. It's fun now because we tell them about all the things they didn't know...like when I was 15 and a friend and I set fire to an entire farm causing a 3 alarm fire. It was an accident.. a lil' fun fire that well..got out of control. My dad laughs at it now, but says he could imagine something else on fire had he known then. My ass. I laugh at it now, knowing I got away with it and my ass didn't catch fire

For right now, I'm enjoying his simplicity and how Cam views life as a giant playground without care...it's pretty relieving to come home to after a long day of work where everyone is on time constraints, meeting deadlines and . Of course, potty training is HORRIBLE! He held himself for almost an entire day a few days back because he didn't want to go on the toilet or in his pants. His belly looked like there was an alien crawling around. Good times when he finally did go. I don't think I've crapped that much, EVER!


Keep them rollin'....


Lookin' forward to the first date thing (had wanted to do the cleaning of the gun when the first date came over myself..haha) .... I wanted a daughter so bad when we found out Kath was pregnant. Am more then thrilled that didn't happen now. 2 nieces and my brothers have nothing but horror stories. And my friends with daughters tell the same stories. I got off easy...and we're keepin' it that way.

[CapoGreg]

Younger sister brings home her first serious boyfriend for the first time. My dad, who's paralyzed from the waist down, comes out of his bedroom in his wheelchair with a 9mm on one shoulder and a .40 on the other and says, "With my older daughter if a boy broke her heart I could chase him down, since I can't do that anymore I've found other ways."

[Rut Row]

Younger sister brings home her first serious boyfriend for the first time. My dad, who's paralyzed from the waist down, comes out of his bedroom in his wheelchair with a 9mm on one shoulder and a .40 on the other and says, "With my older daughter if a boy broke her heart I could chase him down, since I can't do that anymore I've found other ways."

and? did he come back?

My Dad insisted my sister's first serious guy come help on the farm. The poor SOB picked the weekend we were cleaning out the chicken house. We let him drive the tractor and spread manure. Unfortunately Dad did his usual thing (all of us boys learned the same way) and let the n00b learn the hard way that you don't spread manure downwind.

[CapoGreg]

Not only did he come back, they ended up married and have twin girls.

[Hare]

Old days racing MAMA at Aquasco Raceway, Sean the oldest but then he was 5 and was getting pretty DAMN good on his PW50, end of a good day as he pulls up to the cube van, we had a wide moving van ramp, I tell him "why dont you just ride it up" he looks at me like i am crazy and asks if i am sure, i nod like saying "you got this" and turn away. Next thing i know he pins it, by the top of the ramp hes doing a good 10 mph and becomes airborne, he cleared the wheelwells and everything else and hits the front wall of the cube van 3' off the ground, the bike plops straight down in the corner still standing, hell perfectly put away in the corner, he gets off like nothing ever happened.

[hondahawkrider]

Younger sister brings home her first serious boyfriend for the first time. My dad, who's paralyzed from the waist down, comes out of his bedroom in his wheelchair with a 9mm on one shoulder and a .40 on the other and says, "With my older daughter if a boy broke her heart I could chase him down, since I can't do that anymore I've found other ways."

and? did he come back?

My Dad insisted my sister's first serious guy come help on the farm. The poor SOB picked the weekend we were cleaning out the chicken house. We let him drive the tractor and spread manure. Unfortunately Dad did his usual thing (all of us boys learned the same way) and let the n00b learn the hard way that you don't spread manure downwind.

I remember those kinds of dads when I was dating.... Fortunately, I found dating got easier after being divorced once... WHen your divorced twice - it's the her friends who do that crap to you....

I ran afowl of a father, mother, grandmother, and an uncle of once when I was 21 and the g/f was 18 (family was very redneck - she was the first one to go to college).. I got "I need to talk to you" from the G/F right before I was wisked away.. I had the forethought to keep my mouth shut thru most of it.. I was assaulted by questions about relationships, marriage, babies, sex, etc. I kept my cool barely.. I was sweating buckets.. G/f finally gets me alone and tells me that she told her mom she was sexually active as the reason for her somewhat frequent UTI's. I remember sighing with relief as I went "thank god, I thought you were pregnant, they were expecting us to get married" .. The rest of the evening did NOT go well for me..